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World record in sight with world's best job
(by Christine Thome - September 23, 2009)
BEYOND MY CONTROL, BY CHRISTINE THOME
World record in sight with world's best job
In this economy, most people are happy just to have a job. But if you could pick the perfect job, what would it be?
My husband, John, thinks being a professional beer taster is the pinnacle career. I could definitely see myself as a professional wine taster, or better yet, a professional mattress tester. Maybe I could do each part time. A wine taster by day and a mattress tester by night.
Certainly, there are many jobs I wouldn't want to have, such as a deodorant sniffer. Did you know there are people who must sniff armpits to determine if the deodorant is living up to its promise to prevent wetness and odor? I'm guessing there's a lot of sniffing being done before they find the right formula. My kids' gym bags are enough to tell me that there is no deodorant on this planet strong enough to fight the sweaty stink of the average teenager.
Or who wants to be a dog-food tester? When a dog food claims it has a new and improved taste, how do they know that for a fact? You can't count on a dog's palate; anything must taste better than the dead, rotting squirrel in the back yard that usually serves as the special of the day. So surely there must be people with discriminate tastes who can detect the subtle difference between Grade D beef and an old leather shoe.
As you may remember from last week's column, my husband was one of 17 men and women who asked Guinness to confirm the world record for the most people performing a full-body burn at once. Because I am the only sane one in the group (which is a very scary thought), they put me in charge of hosting the Guinness representative, Danny Girton Jr.
Now, this man has one of the most incredible jobs in the world as he travels the globe to verify the most amazing stunts and meet incredible people. As he said, "Whatever you can think of, I have probably seen it!"
When I Googled Danny's name, the first link that came up showed him in a photo with Holly Madison and hundreds of Las Vegas showgirls after he verified the "world's longest bikini line."
"Damn, that guy has the best job ever!" John exclaimed. "I didn't think anything could be better than being a professional beer taster."
"Who's Holly Madison?" I asked.
"Mom! I can't believe you don't know who Holly Madison is," my 15-year-old son yelled across the room. "She's Hugh Hefner's girlfriend and on that show 'The Girls Next Door'"
"Our 15-year-old son knows who Holly Madison is!" I whispered to my husband. "Do you know who Holly Madison is?"
"I have no idea what the boy is talking about, dear," he replied sheepishly.
When I picked Danny up from the airport on the day of the fire burn, I asked him, among other things, where he had been the day before, and he explained that he was in Kansas City to view the world's largest footprint painting. Thousands of people each paid $1 to dip their feet into paint and walk on a monstrous-size sheet. Sponsored by a church, all proceeds went to ship shoes to needy children.
"Nobody in Kansas City could believe my next stop was to watch a bunch of people set themselves on fire," he laughed.
"Trust me, you're definitely not in Kansas anymore, Toto," I laughed. "You just went from the gates of heaven yesterday to the fires of hell today!"
According to Danny, Guinness receives over 60,000 requests a year, yet only 3 percent of them become verified world records. I'm very proud to announce that Danny verified the fire burn as a Guinness world record -- 17 men and women performing a full-body burn for 43.9 seconds.
"I've seen a lot of things in this job," he told me later as we discussed the incredible sight of seeing 17 people on fire at once. "But I have to tell you, this probably rates as one of the top two most amazing sights!"
Aw, I bet he says that to all the crazy people.
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