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Hi-jinks run wild in busted bust
(by Dave Lange - June 02, 2010)
COUNTY LINE, BY DAVE LANGE
Hi-jinks run wild in busted bust
The recent episode involving the scuttled Highway Patrol sting at the Ohio Governor's Residence in suburban Columbus deserves a segment on the Comedy Channel. It involved an entertaining cast of characters, even though they appeared to hold their pants up.
First, there was Gov. Ted Strickland, a mild-mannered ordained Methodist minister, and a Democrat yet, under whose nose prison inmates working at his residence were suspected of smuggling contraband back to their own residence in the Pickaway Correctional Institution. The old canard about Democrats coddling criminals would require a rewrite, however, because convicts did soft time in the mansion under Republican governors as well.
Next, there was the Highway Patrol, doing its best imitation of a "Reno 911" caper by turning an intercepted letter from a prisoner about the drop-off of a "six pack" outside the mansion into the crime of century. The account of the captured letter was enough to convince the bumbling media and complicit politicians that it referred to illicit drugs. In fact, this drug bust was so critical to the well-being of the state that it would have to be carried out while Mr. Strickland was entertaining guests. Just imagine the cops chasing jailbirds around the governor's house while he and his hoity-toity visitors spilled champagne on their tuxedos and canapes on the carpet.
But in real life, there always seems to be a spoiler. In this case, it was unconfirmed Public Safety Director Cathy Collins-Taylor, who called the whole thing off -- to spare her boss, Gov. Strickland, from embarrassment, if you can believe her accusers. Or it was Highway Patrol Superintendent David Dicken, if you can believe Mr. Dicken and Ms. Collins-Taylor.
At any rate, the target of the would-be drug bust turned out to be tobacco, which is one of the deadliest drugs, but it's perfectly legal, except behind bars. Aside from Comedy Central, most sane people would not expect the police to bust into the governor's chambers in pursuit of Marlboro or Mail Pouch. By the way, there have been no reports that the presumed delivery of deadly tobacco ever materialized, which makes this busted bust a real bust and should make everybody bust out laughing.
Well, Ohio Inspector General Tom Charles didn't crack a smile, and, egged on by the governor's detractors, he staged an investigation that made Ms. Collins-Taylor look like liar, liar with her pants on fire. How dare the public safety director deny under oath giving the order to cancel the big drug bust that turned out to be tobacco, which didn't show up.
Incidentally, Mr. Charles' wife is a Highway Patrol captain who was passed over for a promotion last fall by Ms. Collins-Taylor. But that didn't raise concerns about the objectivity of his inquest into this heinous dereliction of duty to follow up on a wonderful opportunity to embarrass Gov. Strickland in an election year.
Enter Geauga County's very own state Sen. Timothy J. Grendell, R-Chester, chairman of the Senate Criminal Justice Committee, who led the Republican crusade to block the confirmation of Ms. Collins-Taylor as public safety director and cast aspersions on the governor.
So Ms. Collins-Taylor has been sent packing, Mr. Strickland has been righteously stung, Mr. Charles' wife may get that promotion after all, the term-limited Sen. Grendell got to grandstand for a seat in the Ohio House, the tobacco remains at large, and the joke's on everyone else.
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