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This gift list is sure to satisfy
(by Barbara Christian - November 26, 2008)
WINDOW ON MAIN STREET, BY BARBARA CHRISTIAN
This gift list is sure to satisfy
What's your favorite post-Thanksgiving activity? Do you nap? Watch four football games at the same time? Do you pick at the turkey carcass? Or do you start planning your next day's shopping strategy?
If you are like my friend Betty, it's none of the above. She likes to curl up with a good catalog or 20, and, after the dishes are done, she peruses them in search of just the right thing for her husband, Jack, better known as, Mr. I-don't-need-anything-but-your-love-honey. That Jack.
However, if Betty took Jack up on his magnanimousness, there would be one sad 250-pound man on Christmas morning. Not a pretty sight. So Betty combs the catalogs for the perfect gift for her man.
What makes this a challenge is that Jack is one of those people who has everything. So the catalogs which hold most promise for Betty are those which showcase items he never knew he needed.
Maybe you have a Jack or a Jill like this on your list. Not to worry. Betty has combed the catalogs for you, and she has come up with the following Hanukkah, Christmas or Kwansai gift suggestions for the impossible-to-shop-for guy or gal on your list. Shall we begin?
For starters, how about a glass coffee table that doubles as a 25-gallon aquarium and costs a mere $600? Or if your hard-to-buy-for sweetie is an Elvis fan, consider the animatronic singing and talking Elvis bust at the love-me-tender and frugal price of $200.
Here is something he or she didn't know was a life necessity -- an ultrasonic eyeglass cleaner for $70. In that same category is the sweet-spot-finding, laser-guided pool cue at 80 buckaroos.
If your man or woman lives a high-stress life that does not allow him or her to take a breath, $300 will buy him or her a portable oxygen bar complete with nose filters and built-in speaker, which plays four healing musical selections.
Or if your honey is still mourning the death of Steve Irwin, there is the very unusual, genuine skin-o-stingray wallet at $70. It's said to be tougher and more resilient than ordinary materials, is naturally waterproof, and, of course, the barbs have been removed. Along those same lines is a stainless steel wallet at $90. It will not rust. We didn't know that was a problem.
For the flabby-tummy cowboy or cowgirl in your life, there is a modern version of the mechanical bull. For $2,000, he or she can saddle up and have fun working those pesky core muscles. Or, for much less, there is the underwater pogo stick. It works the funny bone and costs just $60.
If a little kid lives in your adult loved one, how about gifting him or her with a remote-controlled tarantula- or marshmallow-shooting burp gun or bazooka? Or if he or she is hopelessly lost in the 1970s, there is the personal dual disco ball for $60.
If all of the above still don't do it for you, think about the extended-reach, six-angle body-hair groomer-trimmer. It's something truly special for that hard-to-buy-for Yeti doubling as the human in your life.
All of the above listed "stranger-than-fiction" items are real. If you want to know where to buy them, call me. Betty has given us all the details.
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